When you look at the news nowadays, it seems as if prices keep going up. From gas to groceries, there’s no denying that everything’s getting more expensive by the second. It’s getting harder and harder to keep your finances in check – even more so when you have a partner.
Some couples tend to tiptoe over their finances to avoid conflicts, arguments, and, eventually, breakups. However, it’ll do both of you a world of good if you take care of your financial health as a couple.
It’s a good idea to be open about your financial situation, learn to communicate your financial goals, and begin talking about your money habits whether you’re married, engaged, or just starting to get serious with someone.
When To Have The Talk
The best time to talk about your finances is when their money mixes with yours. This is usually the case when you start living and paying bills together. At this time, your partner’s money, and vice versa, might begin to have a more significant impact on yours.
Money problems might arise at any time throughout a relationship:
- when you’re dating for the first time
- when you decide to live together
- when you’re choosing to start a family
- when purchasing a home
- when you want to retire
Remember, all of these problems must be communicated and resolved.
How To Have The Talk
It really shouldn’t be difficult to discuss money with your partner, but it often is. Many folks are unsure how to approach the topic. Some are more forthcoming about their finances, while others prefer to keep their money matters a secret. When you’re ready to talk about money with your partner, keep these simple tips in mind.
Have An Open Mind
It’s already tricky to discuss financials, and having a rigid attitude will only stop these money conversations. “That’s how I’ve always done it” or “My parents did it this way, so we should, too”— these statements will only make matters worse, pushing your partner to stop conversing with you.
Carefully listen to your partner’s approach to money management. If your points of view differ, don’t pressure them to believe the same things you do. Instead, talk it over with them and figure out why they spend or save the way they do.
Don’t Make A Big Deal Out Of It
Bring up finances even before you get irritated over a large purchase your partner made. The greatest method to talk about money is to do so on a daily basis.
Money is an inevitable element of life; it isn’t a significant concern until it is. And when you don’t talk about it and hide things instead of airing them out, it becomes a major concern.
It’s Not Just About What You Spend
When couples attend to discuss money with each other, they tend to focus solely on spending habits. The one leading the conversation may get obsessed with how much the other person spends on eating out, going to social gatherings, purchasing groceries, etc. While creating healthy spending habits is an essential element of money management, it is not the sole issue.
In addition to expenditures, you should discuss how much the other partner makes. This will be very useful if you’re thinking about moving in together. If you decide to take your relationship to the level, you should have financial discussions before doing anything.
Don’t Lie Or Hide The Truth
Financial talks are some of the most challenging conversations you’ll have with your partner. And when someone doesn’t want to put themselves through this discomfort, it’s tempting for them to conceal their financial background.
It’s better to be upfront about your financial condition. For example, tell your partner if you went to college and built up $30,000 in student loans. Let them know if you have problems adjusting to the freedom of revolving credit and have a lot of credit card debt.
Just think about how they would react if they learned about these situations from someone other than you. This might spell the end of your relationship when this goes out of control. Even if you don’t believe it impacts them right now, they may choose to become your spouse in the future, making the issue theirs as well.
Value The Experience
Understanding your partner’s financial thinking may help you strengthen your relationship. After this difficult but productive conversation, you’ll start to see your partner’s habit of saving, spending, and earning money. This information can help you be more conscious when your partner makes a buy that doesn’t make sense to you and vice versa.
You will be able to listen to your partner’s mindset without trying to convert them to your way of thinking if you manage this situation correctly. Sharing these behaviors with one another helps build trust. This will help you maintain a healthy and pleasant financial relationship with your partner.
Make It A Habit
Make financial discussions a regular part of your life as a couple. Depending on your relationship and finances, that may be once a week, once a month, or once a quarter. You can keep them brief just as long as they’re consistent.
Having regular money talks will allow you to assess what’s working while adjusting to any changes. Financial circumstances change all the time. Planning is a great strategy, but you also need to monitor how they are going and be adaptable.
Love and Finances
Discussing money can make us feel vulnerable. Earn your partner’s trust by being exceedingly empathetic and helpful when talking about your finances. Even if you and your partner have different financial goals, it’s vital to explain those differences to one another.
Remember that as your love grows, so does your financial intimacy. If you can’t seem to talk about money, then it might be easier to bring in a counselor to help you go through your problems.
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